Showing posts with label anxiety. Show all posts
Showing posts with label anxiety. Show all posts

Sunday, July 15, 2012

Medical Marijuana and Me

Marijuana and I have quite the history. I never touched anything so called "drug" related growing up and like a lot of people thought marijuana was a horrible zombifying gateway drug. I felt this way for years and years and judged so many people because of their marijuana use. Now, let me point out now, that ANYTHING taken out of moderation is not good for you, the same goes for marijuana. Anyways, I have a long history of hernia surgeries! You know those ones with the mesh that's in the news for the lawsuits? Well that's what I've got plus a huge number of other ailments. Well for the longest time I turned to narcotic pain killers and admittedly became very addicted to them. I also suffer from chronic depression, PTSD, anxiety disorder, bipolar, self mutilation disorder, among a long list of other issues, so I was on a high amount of anti psychotics. Let's just say, I was a mess. People don't realize what mental illness does to a person and that it's as much of a disease as any other. Well after years on heavy narcotics and antipsychotics my kidneys were failing, AND I WAS ONLY 28!!! So after an evening talking with my husband and doing research online, I "luckily" (so to speak) had an appointment with my doctor that next morning and talked with her about it. I had expressed to her my concerns about it which she understood. Honestly though, at that point I was SO sick of pills and knowing I was on the road to death I was willing to try anything. So she filled out the paperwork for my medical marijuana card and that was that! Due to a natural plant I was able to completely withdraw from 1600mg of Seraquil, over 3 Xanax a day, any narcotics, I could literally go on an on. I will say my first time smoking marijuana was pretty funny! Had no idea what to expect but I pretty much just laughed my ass off just about the whole time! It took me time to come off of so much but I did it!!! I read stories all the time about medical marijuana saving people's lives. I'm proud to be among them.
There is a lot of uneducated judgment that comes along with my situation. I'm a stay at home mother and a medical marijuana patient, and those words don't go together for a lot of people. "You're a mom and you smoke weed!" That's what I get. Here's the thing though, I was such a zombie on all the man made pills that my mother in law had to watch my kids because I was incapable. That's a HARD thing for a mother! Now I'm with my kids nearly nonstop! We have tickle fests, we dance, we laugh, we play. I have a relationship with my kids because I am able to handle my symptoms with the use of my medicine. I want people to know about marijuana and the hemp plant in general and hopefully change some misconceptions! I hope you all enjoyed my little story and I'll be posting more on medical marijuana and facts about its uses...stay tuned!

Also here's a story that was published on me, in case you want to read it here it is :)
http://www.sfreporter.com/santafe/article-6829-dry-market.html

Peace out...
MamaK

Saturday, July 14, 2012

Just be you &;3

Everyone in your life has their own opinion on how you should live your life. It's always about how you should do things better, be better...whatever it is. Too often we take others opinions and let it affect how we live our life. How are you supposed to truly be happy in life if you're living it for everyone else? Just being you is enough; more than enough actually.

This is the lesson I'm working on right now. It's a hard one though. We want approval from those around us. It's imbedded in us from when we're little to try and make others happy. Us as parents need to make sure that we are teaching our kids how to be happy within themselves. Being a parent is by FAR the hardest job ever. We take for granted that everything we do when they are young is shaping them for life! And people will tell you how to raise your kids and you HAVE to let it roll off you and raise your kids the way YOU believe is right!

Stick to your convictions, trust in yourself and Just Be You <3


Friday, July 13, 2012

Intro to ME!!!

Hello All!!!
As stated in my description, I love to write!  I also have a quite unique situation, but doesn't everybody?  In this blog, I am going to strive to be an author that is relatable.  I am a mom of beautiful little girls, a wife to a great husband (But they all have their days lol), an actress, medical marijuana patient (of which I will get more into later on), a daughter, sister, and friend. I suffer from PTSD, chronic depression, and have a horrible anxiety disorder. Although I am finding the light at the end of my tunnel and bright times are in sight!  I am REAL!  I wear pajamas to the store occasionally...I use duct tape..a lot lol...and I run around like a chicken with my head cut off 90% of the time. I don't weigh what I should, and don't eat nearly as well as I should.  I also have a huge heart that gets me in trouble a lot. I have had issues with boundaries my entire life...BUT that's changing!  It's time to start living and being happy, and not someone elses idea of happy! I would like to gain a following of people that relate and would love to chat and bring up great ideas for articles. I'm very excited about not only helping people realize they're not alone, but for my own sanity as well.  I will leave this intro short and will be writing more in the morning when I'm more awake...lol!

Peace Out Always

MamaK